Sonic Storylines Are Poopy

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 05:14:26 AM

And I decided to ponder why a little while ago and I think the answer might be as bright as day. Aren't the current writers the guys who did Happy Tree Friends? You know, that gory show nobody likes? Well hear me out here because I have an idea for SEGA that just might work.

GET RID OF THEM.

...is what you'd expect me to say, but I think they're salvageable and that maybe they just stepped outside their comfort zone. From what I've seen of HTF the stories are like Saturday Morning cartoons. They're very short with a very simple plot and the show is based more around the scenarios in which the characters can be brutalized than the story itself. I think the same could go for Sonic, sans the brutality. Sonic stories are supposed to be these grand schemes or whatever and I feel that's where it suffers. These guys really can't do long, coherent stories.

So my proposition? Have the next Sonic game be like a Saturday morning cartoon show. Have a single 'episode' or stage dedicated to one simple plot, maybe have a skipable cutscene for before and after the stage, then just drop that plotline for the next stage. This way it totally makes sense for Sonic to be in a Volcano in one stage and an underwater lair the next. Really I feel the story really limits these guys, not that I like Happy Tree Friends or anything, but Sonic Lost World's story was ass and I feel like they could benefit from a change in structure.

On a sidenote, I know Eggman is supposed to be this insane scientist nowdays, but I'd really like to see him put in situations like Man of the Year.

Ioshyriku · February 03, 2014, 05:35:52 AM

That'd be awesome.
Although I enjoyed the story of Lost World for a little bit.

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 06:23:13 AM

Quote from: {Your Lovely Kyo}~ on February 03, 2014, 05:41:56 AM
Or just hire Shiro Maekawa back.

He wrote Sonic Advenutre, Adventure 2, Heroes and was supevisor for Sonic X.
... Though he also wrote the script for Sonic 06.

Well I'm talking making it as affordable as possible, which I assume doesn't involve laying off an entire team to replace them with one guy.

Hakudamashi · February 03, 2014, 07:22:37 AM

I think they need the character writers of old, with the current story writers.
Less angst, more slapstick.

Tanassy · February 03, 2014, 07:30:07 AM

Quote from: jkid101094 on February 03, 2014, 05:14:26 AM
You know, that gory show nobody likes?

Kill yourself.

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 07:32:55 AM

Quote from: Tana on February 03, 2014, 07:30:07 AM
Kill yourself.

I already have the noose tied but that's neither here nor there.

I'd expect you to like that shit though, seeing as how much you like guro (you fucking weirdo).

Tanassy · February 03, 2014, 07:40:30 AM

Woah, I wasn't being serious. I enjoyed it once upon a time but since then I've become a lot more squeamish.

I really hope you're kidding about that. And I take being a weirdo as a compliment. (Guro was a phase)

Hakudamashi · February 03, 2014, 07:42:10 AM

HTF 2 violent 4 m3 :C

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 07:44:29 AM

Quote from: Tana on February 03, 2014, 07:40:30 AM
Woah, I wasn't being serious. I enjoyed it once upon a time but since then I've become a lot more squeamish.

I really hope you're kidding about that. And I take being a weirdo as a compliment. (Guro was a phase)

I was absolutely kidding, sweetheart.
I just forget to use "*shot*" sometimes. You know better than anyone that I'm not dumb enough to actually go and hang myself. I don't even have rafters or a ceiling strong enough to support me on the rope.

But like I said, that's neither here nor there. Glad you got over the guro phase, though. That shit would scare me out of the bedroom had we ended up living together.

Hakudamashi · February 03, 2014, 08:11:23 AM

And I think the tone of the stories should be like Sonic and the Secret Rings at most, and Sonic Hereos at the very least.

I think Sonic should be corny and full of cheese.

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 08:13:40 AM

Quote from: Hakudamashi on February 03, 2014, 08:11:23 AM
I think Sonic should be corny and full of cheese.

That sounds delicious and not because I'm hungry.

Hakudamashi · February 03, 2014, 08:30:11 AM

I hope you know hedgehogs make it a habit to lather their bodies with poison =/

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 08:32:57 AM

Quote from: Hakudamashi on February 03, 2014, 08:30:11 AM
I hope you know hedgehogs make it a habit to lather their bodies with poison =/

Well two things about that.

1). I assume that if it was stuffed with corn and cheese it would have been properly washed and prepared beforehand, I.E, no poison.

2). I never said I wanted to eat Sonic in the first place, just corn and cheese.

Hakudamashi · February 03, 2014, 09:04:29 AM

Quote from: jkid101094 on February 03, 2014, 08:32:57 AM
Well two things about that.

1). I assume that if it was stuffed with corn and cheese it would have been properly washed and prepared beforehand, I.E, no poison.

Unless the guy serving is a douchebag.

jkid101094 · February 03, 2014, 09:08:54 AM

Quote from: Hakudamashi on February 03, 2014, 09:04:29 AM
Unless the guy serving is a douchebag.

If he wants his restaurant shutdown and to be charged with attempted murder than sure.

Though I'm not sure if the poison hedgehogs use is lethal to humans anyway.